Sunday, June 27, 2010

Only Yesterday.

Written by : Mia Insomnia - January 7, 2010.

It seemed like yesterday. Joshua came home from school with a big grin playing on his handsome face, and sparkles in his blue eyes. Where he knocked on the old, wooden door, but waited for no one to open it, he just barged into his house. The packed, dusty living room was the first thing he saw, but he took no notice of it. Instead, in strong spirits, he ran up the hall straight to his mother's bedroom. And as usual, he started calling for her. Like a five year old girl who had lost her mother, or like a ten year old boy who was hungry and came home seeking to be fed. It was all fresh in his mind, is if it were just five minutes ago. It was as clear as looking through glass.

He was a lucky son. And Joshua wish for nothing else when he realized that that is everything he wishes. He knew it was more than enough for his mother to answer his call by the third time. It was always the third time, but he was relieved that she kept on answering him. She still replied him though she was weak, and sick. Never once had she turned him down, made him shed a tear. He felt like the luckiest son on earth, and no one could ever feel the same way he had.

"Mother," he called for the third time that day.

"Joshua dear…" She replied shakily. Her smile was visible though her entire part of body was covered with clothes and even her face was wrapped by bandages. Joshua's heart sang with happiness, he could never be happier. He went closer and kneeled down on the floor beside his mother's bed.

"I miss you already, Mother," the words came out softly from his lips. He felt the urged of sudden tears on the edge of his eyes. But he didn't let them flow; he had to be strong for her. He'd do anything for her even if it meant to risk his blood.

Her fingers moved but didn't try to reach him, "Me too, my sweet. I'm a dead corpse whenever you're not home." That sentence, however, was killing him; it felt as if a murderer had silently pierced a knife at his heart. He shook his head and uselessly swallowed for strength.

"Mother, please don't say those words. I don't like it," he pleaded. But she let out a low sigh and shook her head.

"It's a fact though, Joshua…" Joshua knew more than well that he had to close the topic and drive her attention on something else. And that was how the day went by. Everyday after school, he'd spent his entire free hours with her. It made them both happy, he realized. Joshua couldn't find anything else better to do than taking care of his mother, feeding her while she mumbled, telling her jokes while she complained, and sometimes he'd risk his self to kiss her eyes before she faded to her beauty sleep. When he knew her disease could always get to him anytime it wanted to. Then again, he didn't care.

The happiest moment of his everyday routine was the second he heard her answering his call. And he knew that nothing would ever make him happier than hearing his name formed from his mother's lip.

But today… Today everything had gone forever. Everything had changed. Nothing like yesterday had happened.. And it would never happen again. He had came home from his college with the same big grin and sparkling eyes he wore everyday, but it was already the sixth time he called for his mother.

Today, Joshuanever received an answer.

The beautiful, soft words of his mother weren't there to answer him anymore, to make him smile, to give him stronger spirits and to lift him up to continue his days of his meaningless life. Even when he reached her on the bed, kneeling down beside her like he used to do, she still didn't answer him. Not even making a move or a signal showing she would answer him eventually. She was there, lying on the same bed. With all her skins covered and her eyes closed, he still could see her smooth smile on her pale lips.

And for once, Joshua felt all the feelings he hadn't feel before. Suddenly, he was sad, he was hurt and he even shed not a tear but waterfalls of it. Suddenly… He felt like he was the unluckiest son ever.

Because he just wish more than ever to come peacefully together with his mother. Together in heaven.

© Copyright 2010.

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